I'd Wait for Life
by The Steppy One
Summary: Sequel to 'Hold On', Hermione's thoughts during Ron's time out.


**Little sequel to Hold on, song by the same band - Take That - Hermione's point of view while ROn's off wandering and clearing his head! :D**

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I'd Wait for Life**  
_Songwriters: Donald, Howard; Owen, Mark Anthony; Orange, Jason; Barlow, Gary;_

There's a place we used to be, There's a face that I used to see  
There's a picture with you by my side, There's a moment that I want to find.

I don't know where to start, Or how to begin, But I know I love you still.

If you ever turn away, If you ever change your mind  
If the road ahead becomes too hard to climb  
If there's something in your heart that tells you to stop  
Oh to hold you close tonight  
I'd wait for life.

There's a voice shouting inside my head, There's a space on your side of the bed  
There's a hope every time there's a sound, There's a silence that's playing too loud

I don't know where you are, Or how you may be, But I know I love you still.

If you ever turn away, If you ever change your mind  
If the road ahead becomes too hard to climb  
If there's something in your heart that tells you to stop  
Oh to hold you close tonight  
I'd wait for life.

If I close my eyes  
I'll dream a little deeper baby  
'Cause you are always on my mind  
Yeah you are always on my mind  
For life.

If you ever turn away, If you ever change your mind  
If the road ahead becomes too hard to climb  
If there's something in your heart that tells you to stop  
Oh to hold you close, yeah, oh to hold you close, tonight  
I'd wait for life.

I remember when we were happy, and I don't just mean 'getting on with life' happy, I mean really happy. When we would just be sitting watching the telly or listening to the wireless and we'd turn to each other and just smile. Not because we felt we needed to, because we should or because we couldn't think of anything to say. Just because we were that happy that smiling was the only thing we could do.

I wish I could see him smile like that again. Occasionally I see it, occasionally I smile that way too, but all to often it fades too quickly. Disappearing not to be seen for too long a time.

I look across to the chest of drawers and see the many photographs of us on there. There's not one where we're not smiling or laughing, or just generally being silly. Even the one where we're both asleep on the sofa, which Harry took when he flooed in one evening expecting us to be up and about, shows us smiling in our sleep. It's the reason Harry took it. Ron is smirking - he has no idea what he was dreaming about, and I just look content.

I wish we could find moments like that again. All we seem to do now is argue.

I still love him, I know that and I know that I can't live without him and we need to fix whatever went wrong. But I have no idea how to start putting us back together, because I'm not entirely sure what went wrong to start with.

I can see it, every time one of us says something that annoys the other, I can see exactly what's going to happen, can see the hurt that's about to be caused, and hear the words that are about to be shouted. Regardless of this I still carry on as I, we always do, causing the hurt, feeling the pain, shouting the words I don't mean and hearing the ones I know aren't true.

He's not here anymore, he left and I'm cold, I'm wearing his T-shirt and I look at the hem, pulling at the seem. I look at his side of the bed and it's obviously empty. I know he'll come back, he always does. But there's this part of me that's terrified he's left for good. It's only a small part, but it can shout pretty loudly, and I'm hearing it loud and clear now. The door opens and I breathe in sharply, waiting for him to appear. He doesn't, it's Crookshanks. He scuttles under the bed and I can hear him scratching at something. At every new sound he makes I think it's Ron coming back. Hope builds inside me then fades, replaced by a bigger fear than was there before.

Crookshanks leaves the room and suddenly it's far too quiet. Even when he's not talking I love being able to hear Ron. Just him breathing is a constant comfort that he's here with me and nowhere else.

Where he is at the minute, I don't know. I don't know how he'll be feeling either. Angry, probably. Frustrated at me, and at his self, too. Confused because he doesn't know why this keeps happening. Really, I do know how he feels because I'm feeling the same.

What it comes down to, is one decision I have to make: whether I still want to be with him. On thinking it the answer comes to me instantly, of course I do. I want to be there when he's happy, comfort him when he's hurt. Help him when he feels he can't go on, encourage him when he loses his self belief and just be with him. If only he was here so I could tell him.

But would I though? Or would I just let things carry on as they are, toxic and hurting and just plain wrong.

I lie down on the bed and close my eyes, wishing with all my heart that he was here, wrapping his arms around me and telling me it was all going to be all right and that we'd work through this.

That's when I hear the quiet pop of him arriving home. I sit up and watch as he walks in the door. In the moment that our eyes meet I know what I have to do, I have to change the ways things are going and remind myself why I fell in love with this man. I told him I'd never leave him, that I'd be there for him no matter what happened, and I will, I have to.

If it takes us weeks, months, years to put things right I'll wait. I'll work at putting things back together. For him, I'll wait.

For him, I'd wait for life.


End file.
